* SNAP *

Please remove your item from the bagging area, please return your item to the bagging area please wait for assistance, please place item in the bagging are, please remove the item from the bagging area please wait for assistance, please place the it--- PLEASE DIE !!!! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIIEEEEEEEEE !!!!!!!

I am certain that most if not all of you have encountered the "Self Checkouts" at Walmart, Canadian Tire, Safeway. etc.  First things first, these are not by ANY definition "self checkouts" seldom if ever do you actually get through these abominations without some kind of assistance from the half-wits at the "Command Post" aka the guard station, situated to ensure that you don't accidentally steal something . . .I say accidentally because the self checkout is entirely likely to not register the purchase you want to make.  Secondly, if I had wanted to be a checkout guy/gal I would have performed a frontal lobotomy on myself years ago!!

Problems abound The above does not even cover the fact that if you are unlucky enough to stuck behind someone even less capable than I am at bagging, and or working the payment system, it entirely likely that the kindly old lady in the isle two rows over, complete with all of her coupons, discount cards, and archaic forms of payment will likely through the line, in her car and on her way home before you even finish looking up the code for crimini mushrooms. 

I hate these things I hate those that use them and hate the stores that employ them. Alas, I was able to discern only one possible positive result of these infernal devices